Sunday, July 25, 2010

Oh Baby What's Your Name?

So some hilarious shit happened the other night that put me and my girlfriend's dating life into perspective. Fuck that, dating in general. It's kinda like a Joe Budden line (I can't help the Joey reference, efff you).. "I got another side I never showed to you, the side where everybody is disposable." And it's as simple as that: Men are disposable. Sounds kinda harsh right... well, lemme esssplain......

So my bestie's in Miami and she decides to hit a couple parties on the beach. 38 shots of Patron and a blunt later... She runs into an ex lover of mine..... and this is the message she hits me with: "You'll never believe who I ran into.... 'The Idiot'!!" .... Bahahahahahahahahahha! Now the reason why this is so fuckin hilarious is because that is his name. That's what we've called him since the beginning and none of my girlfriends even know his actual name.... to the point that she almost called him by his "name" to his face: Idiot. (Side note: "The Idiot" is actually a dope dude and we're friends now, sorry Idiot, but you'll forever have that name ::shrug::)

We give all the boys we date "names", if you will. Government names are not options. Men, you are nobody until the girlfriends know your REAL name. This is typical convo between me and my girls: "Has Gold Teeth called yet".... "Where's White Boy taking you tonight?".... "So how was the sex with Bookstore?".... "OMG, Treadmill left a love note on my car"... "How was the movie with Small Dick C******?"... "You're with your Brazilian Lover aren't you?"... "So how many girls was Kitchen seeing behind your back?" .... "What's up with Beard's friend?"... OR the occasional.... "I have a crush on Big Titties" #imjustsayin. Aight, you get it.

Few have real names. And if you're lucky enough to have a REAL name, maybe you aren't disposable after all.

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